Tuesday, 20 May 2008

Something stupid

I am going to do something stupid...
I think I am going to give them my notes...
What I can see from them, is, refusing to help, but very willing to take advantage on others.
But, because all of us are here, we are supposed to help each other, I felt like in a dilemma whether I should help them. What I can see from them, is a request of help.
I feel disappointed.
He scolded me, for allowing them to bully me like this. But my brother said, it doesn't matter to give them. I won't lose anything.
This is the noble side of my brother. His kindness. But he asked me to make the decision.
I feel suffering, for why our relationship has become like this...
I feel hurt, I feel heartache. He said, there's no need to feel bad for these people.
I know...I should set aside these feelings and stay focus in the exams, but the hurt feeling is there. And I don't know how to deal with these feelings...
But, those who are willing to help me, are those who are not the same race--my housemates.
I am glad that I have them as my housemates...They are willing to help me even when I am not the same race as them...what is the reason for me not to help my classmates?
I am stil in a dilemma...I've alrdy offered help in the first place...I wish to talk to them about my feelings...but...I guess that's not important at all. What important to them, is only my notes...

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